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Sighs
written on Monday, November 9, 2015 @ 11:33 PM ✨{ 1 comments }
I always give people the power to penetrate my walls, may that be strangers or people really close to my heart.

I feel sorry, it’s so unfair to those who sticks with me through my ups and downs that they get to hurt me equally as those who shouldn’t matter to me. I have too much of flaws. I never really liked myself. I always tend to compare myself to others because that’s always it has been. I’ve never really been confident of myself and neither have I had the courage to show off myself because I knew I have something beautiful. I never really find myself beautiful. So when people who shouldn’t matter tell me beautiful things, they become instantly valuable. And I don’t like it. They shouldn’t be hurting me. I shouldn’t be hurting. But whyyyy

People has been exercising the habit of telling me they like me lately but after a few days of showering me beautiful words, they’d be gone and I’m left alone for months wondering what made them go. Was it something I said last night? Have I become too clingy? Were you busy? WHAT. WHY.

 I don’t like you telling me beautiful words then leave me with nothing but awful things. I want to believe I am worth it. But I feel worthless if people keep treating me like this and what I only get is pity on myself. Stop playing with my feelings. I am too weak. So please stop. Spare me.


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