“How amazing it is to find someone who wants to hear about all the things that go on in your head.”


This time..
Anxiety Attack, help!
The photo and the caption #1
In My Cage
08.27.13 Random Insights
Bye Bye Apple Cord.
We accept the love we think we deserve.

Aian Mimiey Zira Fiffy Nova

All gone now, except my feelings.
written on Saturday, October 5, 2013 @ 3:04 PM ✨{ 4 comments }

These past few weeks I have reached my limit and just broke down. It's like every night I am bound to cry helplessly to sleep. Never dealt with such pain before. And all my life he's the only person who can caused me this much. MUCH. He doesn't know though. Never did I ever tell him about what I feel. I was so scared; more like I did accept the fact I fell for him. Instead, I hide it all in and let him adore me.

But things aren't the way they used to be now. Everything has changed. I've become more honest with my feelings. I've gotten to realize I was in love with this man who doesn't love me back anymore. For seven years he has gotten tired and chose his path away from me. I couldn't blame him. I've caused so much pain in his life. And those pain are what I am feeling right now.

Yes, I have been flipped.

But unlike the book and the movie, things are different. He wanted a life without me anymore. He said I deserve other. He never said I deserve better. So I really got what he meant. Of course I am fully aware of that. I don't deserve someone who actually waits for me for a long time and throughout seven years all I did was treat him like shit. I would never deserve someone who's as kind, patient, loving, successful and faithful as him. So I couldn't blame him for realizing things and seeing I wasn't perfect for him.

Just four words.

He has had enough.

He has moved on and I should, too.
But it effing hurts me a lot that I've seen things too late. I want to forget the pain but I don't want to forget that I love him. I was too late to show him what I feel. I've never even had the chance to tell him I loved him.

It was all gone now. Everything. Except my feelings.

© 2014 Tweaked by Kristen